We do not have metamorphosis, metamorphosis "has" us.
Because metamorphosis assumes precedence over other life processes it
will continue by drawing energy from other functions. This loss of
normal function could pose as a crisis for those whose circumstances
cannot accommodate such a shift. A steady increase in the difficulty of
meaningful work is perhaps one of the most essential components of
navigating the storm of awakening successfully and re-integrating
oneself into purposeful relationship to the world. The fact that we are
most often forced to make a living is a saving grace to those
recovering from kundalini for it forces us out in relation to the
world. Studies show that doing complex work as a main occupation lowers
our risk of Alzheimer's disease. The researchers theorize that
performing complex tasks may have an exercise-like effect that builds
up the "cognitive reserve" in the brain. This is reinforcement for the
old axiom "what you don't use you lose."
During active kundalini both sides of the nervous system are
hyperactivated, one sometimes dominating more than the other. One needs
to remain conscious of which side is at play, to lean into it or
counterbalance it if need be. Letting mania, panic or excitation run
away on us will only deepen the following collapse. Too much giving
into parasympathetic lethargy and bliss will ultimately bring on
isolation and depression. The thing to do is to stimulate oneself with
substantial means rather than superficial kicks. Any exercise in nature
helps to integrate and normalize Kundalini energy. During the peak you
may be called to be outside exercising all day, for the soul is closer
to itself outside in nature, no doubt due to the higher ion count in
the air.
Just like any other bodymind function such as eating, sex, thought,
exercise etc... kundalini can be used in an evolutionary sense ie:
spiritual; or used in a devolutionary sense ie: unspiritual. The key is
to have the understanding and discipline to care for our condition
instead of letting it unconsciously play out to the extreme. Setting up
good habits and finding a support system would help. Intelligent
mastery of kundalini takes good faith to move into a higher adaptation,
higher homeostasis rather than using our condition as an excuse to cop
out. Navigation of kundalini requires profound insight and
understanding. Ultimately we learn none of it is about us. This insight
turns what could have been a disaster into our most sublime experience.
I have an intuition that the more primitive areas of our brain are
stronger than the cortex, since the cortex is more likely to flip out
of the picture when kundalini is fired up. It certainly seems like an
emotional purging is happening. One of the functions of kundalini could
be a simple release to bleed off the energy packet that is contained in
the traumatized limbic brain and autonomic system. After an awakening
there is definitely less fear, less reactivity and some distance from
ones emotions in general, they become an object of interest, not the
rule.
The more trauma one receives without being able to resolve it and
dissipate the energy through talk with ones family or therapist, then
the harder the shell of amour contained within the nervous
system. Under such circumstances ones kundalini awakening is likely to
be explosive and potentially damaging, while at the same time being the
deepest form of release and liberation from that trauma. It is a case
of what doesn't kill you will heal you.
The end effect of years of kundalini activity is that ones emotional
memory is somewhat wiped clean, from neuron pruning and the bliss/
anaethetization chemicals. When extra energy is passing through the
limbic brain, more endorphins, and cannaboids are produced in the
pleasure centers...these bliss chemicals reduce concentration and
focus. If the bliss takes over entirely we are likely to become a
good-for-nothing spiritual cow, during which time it becomes
hard to even do any of the Apollionic left-brain faculties. This
unavoidable incapacitation does happen during a certain events or
phases of a kundalini awakening. But it's only at certain periods when
the fullness of kundalini is such that the mind doesn't want to work in
beta wave.
Some seekers are obsessed with simply the state of Being, they
forget about doing...doing, they say, is a distraction from Being. I
call this being a spiritual cow, it’s like they got off the train at
dissolution, and forgot to get back on for the rest of the journey. The
fundamental paradox of existence is that neglect of "doing in the
material world" leads to a descent into matter. Ultimately kundalini
does make for improved rationality, because it unites the Heart with
the mind in a very real sense. Ultimately we even get to look after
ourselves better through higher decision making, rather than myopic
adherence to ones survival code.
With a meditation practice we have some sense of control or confidence
in navigating internal energies and states, for we are already familiar
with the non-ordinary. Kundalini energy, however, we have less control
over so it basically has its way with us, especially if we have had no
spiritual training and are not used to following our intuition. If
bliss interferes with our ability to meditate, if we are already too
blissed to risk further bliss from meditation then something has to be
done.
It's necessary to balance the dissolution with cultivation and
development. By having an integral practice even before we pop we can
avoid being taken over completely by the bliss to the point where our
lives fall apart. This practice should include anything that enhances
the adaptive-ego functions, concentration, focus and the movement of
energy like: martial arts, Qi gong, artwork, design, planning and
fine-coordination practices, archery, chess, math, writing and rock
climbing. Ideally in order to be ready for kundalini one really needs
an integral practice from birth. We need to be culturally prepared to
be our Self. Stepping directly into Self (Bigmind) would be similar to
being in the presence of a Master...except we are the Master. Learning
to contain, and express our mastery is the essence of the spiritual
path.
There is a great reduction in left-brain adaptive function, such as
mathematics, strategy, use of memory and possibly rational or socially
conditioned thinking capacity. The left-brain freeze is concurrent with
these changes, and I suspect that what is occurring is that energy is
being utilized in the bodymind in such a radically different pattern
that it is just not available to serve the normal cerebral cortex and
adaptive ego functions. I went into such right-brain states during my
awakening that I thought I would never recover basic survival and
utilitarian skills. If we go too far into the dissolution without
applying ourselves to keeping up our adaptive functions, we end up as a
helpless, pre-personal, no-self invalid. Muktananda said to his devotes
that after several samadhi experiences he feared he would not be able
to look after himself. In the past the realizers lost most of their
adaptive functions while in their extended periods of metamorphosis
(samadhi). And so they actually "did" need devotees and people to look
after them. Nowadays with the science of raising our homeostatic coping
ability--we can both have our independence and our realization--without
becoming a spiritual basket case.
Think too that with kundalini the power of consciousness over the
body is increased, so we can get into some pretty gnarly health
conditions if we don't know how to process stuff. If we haven't been
given an adequate primal-mother foundation we essentially have to
rebirth ourselves and give ourselves an unconditionally loving
foundation through which to process our heightened awareness, emotions
and sensory input. Society for sure isn't going to provide this
service. Also the amygdalas of some people are wired for more fear than
others. As the kundalini courses through the limbic brain our emotions
are lit up like a lighthouse. This amplification eventually leads to a
maturing of the emotional body, but during the course of the awakening
the extra amps of nerve flow through these areas can lead us on a
rollercoaster ride, experiencing everything from nirvanic ecstasy to
abject terror.
Our stress hormones are known to kill off cells in the hippocampus
or the learning and memory region of the brain. If we are prevented
from dreaming we start exhibiting neurotic and psychotic symptoms.
Visions created by kundalini activation of the hippocampus may be part
of the mechanism of the evolution of consciousness and the
healing-wholing of the spiritualized body. Changing that wiring in the
limbic brain requires some pretty intense intervention. Meditation,
toning, kundalini will to a certain extent. Holotropic breathing and
catharsis probably will help immensely. But the yoga of acting "as if"
is probably one of the best means of changing one's emotional brain to
accord with a higher directive.
Consider that our nervous systems are actually built around the need
and desire to control our world. So when kundalini sparks up and
overwhelms the self-making system in the brain, we can feel intensely
vulnerable and childlike. There is a biological faith that arises in
association with this vulnerability from the bliss chemicals and
expanded heart, but to not have one's normal adaptive and egoic
capacities can be anything from disturbing to terrifying. The more
information we have about what is really happening to us the more we
can support this blind biochemical faith with an informed faith and so
not add secondary stress to the process. When experiencing the
condition of no-self and with radically run-away emotions, the student
is going to require some very fancy explanations to reassure them that
it is merely the natural course of things and not the end of the world.
A guru or teacher can help a student let go of "control."
UG Krishnamurti is perhaps a good example of someone succumbing to
nihilism of the dissolution. Kundalini dismantles former structures,
one has to allow oneself to be dissolved, and then not get too
depressed about being dissolved in order to put oneself back together
again on a higher level. This is where group practice (sangha) can be a
saving grace to the individual. Others who have already been dissolved
and restructured can quicken and perfect the restructuring that needs
to happen after the dissolution. Otherwise what tends to happen is a
floundering, and flapping around in a half dissolved depressed state,
for the dissolved one often cannot find the need, drive, will or skills
necessary for rebuilding.
This point about maladaption to dissolution is vitally important
point for anyone undergoing kundalini or spiritual awakening. The
dissolution of self can lead to nihilism, apathy, depression, lack of
meaning, loss of direction and purpose and social alienation. This dark
night situation will resolve itself once the main phase is over,
especially if there is some care and attention given to exercising the
body and rebuilding one's vocational and relational domains. If we
cannot integrate our awakening into a full life we may became a
Spiritual Bum. I cannot stress enough the need to maintain a well
rounded integral lifestyle representative of the "whole human" during
an awakening, in order to "rehabilitate" to a higher mode, rather than
to fall down to a condition that is inferior to where we were prior to
our popping.
The good thing about the dissolution is that eventually the tide
turns and one has a fierce desire to integrate the awakening and build
up the structure of self to establish a functional life. Life and its
necessary change flows in cycles of deconstruction and reconstruction.
Some may get stuck in the nihilism of deconstruction and they declare
with pride that they are a "no-self" rather than integrating spiritual
achievement into an earthly life. There is a no-self, but there is
equally a self that needs discovering and cultivating as well.
When the witness is becoming stable it's like there is no place to
maneuver, no place to hide, you try to go unconscious and you observe
yourself trying to go unconscious. During intensive meditation practice
and during kundalini awakenings the cerebral cortex is engaged in other
activities. We just have to go-with the consciousness we have, while
exercising our integral-lifestyle functions. In time however we can
stabilize the higher levels of consciousness and our functional
operations as well.
"The underlying principle of Balance in Nature's One Law is
equality of interchange between the pairs of opposites in any
transaction in Nature." Walter Russell
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